Before I joined the gym I go to now, I had absolutely underestimated the number of men who blow dry their hair.
It’s like I was living in a dream world before, where men would be men and simply use a towel to dry their heads and maybe after that not shave their foreheads while naked.
I’m just going to go ahead and take a guess, but I’d say about one out of every four guys that goes to my gym uses the blow drier.
And if there’s that many just at my gym, that means someone you know, someone that you care about, is blow drying his hair.
Look around you right now.
See that guy next to you? The one who you thought was an Okay Guy? Well he’s not, because I bet he blow dries his hair.
Ask him. If he wants to know why, just tell him to read my blog and that I said “Stop being so goddamn fucking weird.” Unless you think he can beat me up. Then don’t mention me. Please.
I don’t get this behavior of using a blow drier.
I really had no idea how many men wanted to somehow – by poofing their hair to the maximum level – become David Hasselhoff.
Don’t get me wrong – The Hoff was great back in the day when he was riding around in Knight Industries Two Thousand (KITT for those losers who didn’t know what it stood for) and kicking bad dude ass, but now he’s just kind of lame.
There are a lot of these dudes in my gym and it makes me uncomfortable.
They turn on the hair drier, pull out their brush, and poof away!
I don’t understand it.
I want to run up to them, knock their brushes to the ground, grab them by the shoulders and scream, “Look at yourself damnit! You’re not a man! What are you doing with your life??? Now you listen to me, you put that hair drier down and you put it down forever – because what you’re doing to yourself is not okay! Use a towel man! Use a fucking towel before I lose all faith in mankind!!!”
But I don’t do that, because I’m just one man fighting a losing battle, a battle that will continue far beyond when I leave this earth.
There will always be men blow drying their hair and it will always be wrong.
No matter what I do, I will not change their minds, because how can you fight a force as strong as The Hoff?
You can’t my friends.
(I also have a guest post up over at Crissy’s Page, so if you really do love me, you’ll go there and read that post too. And if you haven’t already been reading Crissy’s Page, you need to start, because she’s awesome.)