I have something to tell you and you’re not going to be happy about it. But I hope when this is all over, we can still be friends. Or at the very least I can still drunk text you at three in the morning telling you how I just won three dollars by winning an arm wrestling match.
The thing is, I know how hard you’ve been looking for The Coolest Man In The World, but I found him.
I found him this morning, while on the train to the gym.
He is cooler than Montell Jordan.
He is cooler than ALF.
He is even cooler than that time you did a keg stand longer than everyone else at the party and didn’t even puke or sleep with anyone ugly.
He is that fucking cool. I wouldn’t lie to you about something like this.
You can keep looking if you want, but I found him. Behold.
Notice the all white outfit. From the “New York” tank top to the shoes – all white.
Notice the sunglasses. Sure, it was 6:50 AM and he was underground, but The Coolest Man In The World must shield his eyes from the paparazzi, who lurk around every corner.
Notice the body language. Not a care in the world. No rent to think about because he simply tells landlords, “I will live here. That is my payment to you.”
The search is over friends.
You tried your best, but I think we can all agree, there simply is no beating this man.
Victory is his.
(I’m guest posting over at A View From 5280Ft (a great blog) today so please go check it out. I’m writing about feet, which I think is enough of a reason to get you to read it. Go! Please!)