I have today off.
I know, you’re mad at me. But don’t be mad at me, be mad at Chris Columbus, one of the most biggest idiots ever to grace the earth.
The man sailed some ships to a completely wrong destination, told everyone he was first even though he wasn’t, tortured and brutalized the natives that were already there and then became instantly famous for it.
I would love it if my job was exactly the same way.
Me: [Confidently] “Well I wrote the article, but I used facts from other stories and I interviewed someone who doesn’t have anything to do with the subject.”
Boss: “That’s great!”
Me: “Oh, and I punched Sally in the face this morning.”
Boss: [Smiling] “Even better – now let’s talk about that raise.”
Have you ever heard of a job as easy as Christopher Columbus had?
The guy was a complete moron, yet here I am, sitting at home because we recognize his “accomplishments” every single year.
Never has there been a more celebrated idiot than him. Okay, wait, I take that back – people elected Bush twice didn’t they?
So Bush first, Columbus second. I’m thinking Martha Stewart third.
(Since I have the day off, that’s all I got today. I’ve got lots of other stuff to do, like rub my dog’s belly and watch Sportscenter forty times in a row. If you want more, please go check out my guest post at Clever Girl Goes Blog, where I’m talking about a famous person I could do without.)