no time to waste

To all of my Malawi, Africa readers: RUN.

Word is out that Madonna is coming back to take more brown babies, whether you like it or not.  There is nothing you can do – in fact – it might be too late already.

So RUN DAMMIT!  Oh, and in case you can’t read English, here are some pictures to illustrate the horror that is coming for you.

Good luck, and may god save us all.





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38 responses to “no time to waste

  1. Memo to Angelina and Madonna: You know what fills that sense of gaping emptiness better than some poor, unsuspecting child you steal from its mother (and don’t give me that “I didn’t know he had a mother” crap)? Meals that consist of something other than Kabbalah water and celery. Try it sometime.

  2. quite possibly the best illustrated post ever.

  3. You should autograph, frame, and eBay them!

  4. those are the best drawings I’ve ever seen in my entire life.


  5. hahaha

    Madonna scares me.

  6. bwp

    I’m going to print those out and frame them. Wait, will you sign them for me?

  7. I hope that little girl looks at Madge and says “NOT DA MAMA!” and then proceeds to whack her on the head with a frying pan.

  8. Natalie

    hahahahahahahahahaha 🙂

  9. I think we should get a show together. Between these masterpieces and my own Self-Portrait With Pizza and Ninja, we’re clearly the masters of our generation.

  10. You should’ve made her vagina bigger.

  11. You should try to get some gallery to sell those photos.

  12. Madonna will beat up any of those Malawians (I may have just made that word up) that stand in her way w/ her way-too-large-for-a-woman guns. She scares me.

  13. Excellent Paint skills. Still holding out for that picture of a T-Rex though.

  14. Are you available to make drawings for my blog? Those are A-W-E-S-O-M-E.

  15. Also, if you haven’t seen my post today, you’re one of the people I want to see on my penpal list. I’m just sayin’.

  16. Damn she’s scary! Fantastic drawings. You depicted her very well.

  17. I don’t think theres enough wrinkling arm flab in that illustration. Otherwise well played.

  18. Matt


    I love it.

  19. you made her look too feminine.

  20. Second gina clover. Where’s the gun show?

  21. Those little brown kids are all like, “Why won’t this dude leave me alone???” and “Put me down old man!”

  22. LOL…haha…

    Btw, isn’t Madonna a bit more muscular? 😉

  23. CapriceClassic

    OMG! That picture made me chuckle so hard I spit lemonade on my keyboard! Chris you owe me 40 bux!

  24. Ummm… You are a true artist. I take me hat off to you.

    Or I would, if I was wearing a hat.

  25. Those pictures make it all feel almost too real.

  26. Those pictures are FANTASTIC!

  27. those are too awesome 😀

  28. rachel


  29. You know, when you take screen caps from Fox News, you need to credit the source.

  30. I can’t wait for Hollywood to do a Sin City-type movie based on your illustration style.

  31. I’m dying. You kill me.

    I have a friend from Malawi, and I’m pretty certain he’d be able to back you up here.

    Nice illustrations. ^_^

  32. madge looks a little like godzilla.

    “me eat brown babies for breakfast”

  33. Very well illustrated. I didn’t even need written instructions.

  34. This picture can only be enhanced by showing her eating the children like fruit snacks.

  35. Ben

    Oh c’mon…you deserve way more comments on this post considering the amount of effort that clearly went into these pieces of art.

    Where’s the love, blogosphere – you fickle bitch?

  36. the best illustrated post ever. best.

  37. longredcape

    “Africa has white mountains.” BWAHAHAHA

  38. haha funny and so true. I don’t understand why people go to other parts of the world to adopt when they can and should do it in there own country. A child with no parents is the same all around the world, so why go so far?

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