Wedding pictures are boring and cheesy. Everyone knows this.
There’s the one where the bride is looking away in the distance. There’s the one with the groom kissing the bride as the fake wind blows. And then there’s the one with the woman crying because she’s finally realized that she can’t change her man and he will always watch TV in his underwear when her friends are visiting.
They are all terrible and in the end everyone wishes that they didn’t have to pose for any of them.
Of course I have the solution to this, because I am A Thinker.
I’ve decided that for my wedding pictures, I will have an angry falcon airbrushed onto my shoulder in every photo.
Not just a falcon. Anyone could think of that idea.
An angry falcon.
I can even show you how amazing this idea is.
Here is a photo of Ari and I looking normal:
Now here is one of us with an angry falcon:
I bet you didn’t even know angry falcons looked like that, did you? Well they do. But only the really pissed off ones. That’s why you probably thought it looks vaguely like a parrot.
Now I ask you – which picture do you prefer? The choice is clear.
Of course when I mentioned this idea to Ari, she laughed nervously and said something about “not remembering this idea,” but I think that means she thinks it’s perfect and we’ll do it.